![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Jupiter in the 12th House Thoughts
May. 19th, 2024 02:09 am The 12th house is many things. But one thing is that it's the house of self undoing. This can be many things, but here's a few of my thoughts on it as someone who walks the 12th house path and whose power resides within that path.
For a quick reference, my 12th house contains Scorpio and my Jupiter is at 1 degree Scorpio directly opposite my Venus in Taurus.
My first thought is that I often put myself into a glass prison. I can't see this prison until my eyes are opened to it. Sometimes this takes months, sometimes it takes decades. And I do it with ease. I feel like my art has to be X way, or that I cant do X because Y and A have to happen. I can't not be understanding about something because they have it worse than me. Or that I can't do something because I'm not good enough. Fear is something I battle religiously. And what does fear like to do to you? That's right, it likes to make you self-sabotage or self undo. You literally get in your own way. It will keep you from your greatest blessings until YOU decide to move forward.
And here's the thing, fear will keep you in a headspace no one wants to be in. It will keep you small, unwilling to step into the spotlight and be seen. And Fear has kept me in that headspace for many many years.
For example, I recieved something as a gift last year and I was beyond grateful for it. I have used it every day, and it's been a great blessing. But somewhere along the way it became a glass prison. I was constantly checking it, worry and anxiety crept in anytime anyone even asked about it if I had forgotten I had it on me. My whole world revolved around it, and that was blinded to me. I didn't realize it until I took a second and evaluated when my anxiety would start, or when it became almost constant.
Now keep in mind, this item has brought great help and it was given with pure intentions. But I realized today it was time to release it. To take it off and release myself from the glass prison. I'm giving myself time to adjust, but once I had the bravery to take it off, it was like I had a mountain lifted off me. I could breathe. I even left the house without it and my gosh it was the most liberating feeling. And I set a boundary between me and my anxiety. I wouldn't give the anxiety even a foothold in the sanctuary of my mind by keeping that item on me. I could not be anymore proud of myself in this moment either.
Which brings me to my next point.
With the 12th house being the house of self-undoing—this can also refer to undoing yourself aka, transformation. Especially with my 12th house being in Scorpio—the sign of deep and profound transformation.
My power—Jupiter—is within my transformation. Even though that power is hidden from me. I liken this placement to a Phoenix—a mythical creature I have been obsessed with since childhood. This Jupiter/Sun Cazimi and Uranus/Venus conjunction both in Taurus have been placing immense pressure on me to transform as it's been in a whole house opposition to my Jupiter and in the same house as my Venus.
So what I did today was I broke, I transformed in what can be a beautiful way because I freed myself from the prison I'd placed myself in. I transformed into someone who was wholly confident in themselves, their health, and ability to push the anxiety back and tell it "No, you are not welcome here, leave." I reached down into my deeply stubborn nature and chose myself. And, I'll continue to choose myself throughout this journey. Because of my 12th/6th house axis placements, along with my rising sign's nature, I will NOT change unless I want to change—for whatever reason. And because of that, the universe will place me under pressure—even almost to the point of unaliving me to force the change that needs to happen. I have a deep and sacred will that refuses to bend unless I want it to. Which is good, but I'm also being asked to soften that stance. To hold that stance within my heart, but to soften to the energies that be and release to go with the flow of that deep Scorpio energy.
Which is what I want to do, and today was a huge step forward. But I plan to transform and re-create myself as many times as I need to get to where I want to go. As the song Rise by 10 Years says "out of the darkness, step into the light." And that's what I'm doing.
Sure my power still lies within my transformation, within my keeping circle tight and keeping my energy a privilege to access. But it also lies within the beauty that comes after that transformation. It lies within keeping my inner world and secrets under lock and mental boundaries between me and the demons I carry within my mind.
As a 12th houser, my mind will always be my largest battlefield. And perhaps one day more than a few people will be able to traverse the darkness that covers it—but until the day comes, I will continue to transform into my best self. I will continue to keep the subconscious under lock and key so I can heal. Not in the sense that I won't connect to that part of me, but in the sense that I will be discerning as to what I allow into my life to influence it rather than letting all of it run amuck.
And I encourage you to do the same thing. Having a 12th house placement is hard, but if you go with the transformations rather than fight them, you might find that you have a purpose so far outside of yourself that you never knew of.
As for me, I will step into my midheaven's purpose of healing people. And now I can say I am genuinely looking forward to it. I will burn myself to the ground as many times as it takes to get there.
For a quick reference, my 12th house contains Scorpio and my Jupiter is at 1 degree Scorpio directly opposite my Venus in Taurus.
My first thought is that I often put myself into a glass prison. I can't see this prison until my eyes are opened to it. Sometimes this takes months, sometimes it takes decades. And I do it with ease. I feel like my art has to be X way, or that I cant do X because Y and A have to happen. I can't not be understanding about something because they have it worse than me. Or that I can't do something because I'm not good enough. Fear is something I battle religiously. And what does fear like to do to you? That's right, it likes to make you self-sabotage or self undo. You literally get in your own way. It will keep you from your greatest blessings until YOU decide to move forward.
And here's the thing, fear will keep you in a headspace no one wants to be in. It will keep you small, unwilling to step into the spotlight and be seen. And Fear has kept me in that headspace for many many years.
For example, I recieved something as a gift last year and I was beyond grateful for it. I have used it every day, and it's been a great blessing. But somewhere along the way it became a glass prison. I was constantly checking it, worry and anxiety crept in anytime anyone even asked about it if I had forgotten I had it on me. My whole world revolved around it, and that was blinded to me. I didn't realize it until I took a second and evaluated when my anxiety would start, or when it became almost constant.
Now keep in mind, this item has brought great help and it was given with pure intentions. But I realized today it was time to release it. To take it off and release myself from the glass prison. I'm giving myself time to adjust, but once I had the bravery to take it off, it was like I had a mountain lifted off me. I could breathe. I even left the house without it and my gosh it was the most liberating feeling. And I set a boundary between me and my anxiety. I wouldn't give the anxiety even a foothold in the sanctuary of my mind by keeping that item on me. I could not be anymore proud of myself in this moment either.
Which brings me to my next point.
With the 12th house being the house of self-undoing—this can also refer to undoing yourself aka, transformation. Especially with my 12th house being in Scorpio—the sign of deep and profound transformation.
My power—Jupiter—is within my transformation. Even though that power is hidden from me. I liken this placement to a Phoenix—a mythical creature I have been obsessed with since childhood. This Jupiter/Sun Cazimi and Uranus/Venus conjunction both in Taurus have been placing immense pressure on me to transform as it's been in a whole house opposition to my Jupiter and in the same house as my Venus.
So what I did today was I broke, I transformed in what can be a beautiful way because I freed myself from the prison I'd placed myself in. I transformed into someone who was wholly confident in themselves, their health, and ability to push the anxiety back and tell it "No, you are not welcome here, leave." I reached down into my deeply stubborn nature and chose myself. And, I'll continue to choose myself throughout this journey. Because of my 12th/6th house axis placements, along with my rising sign's nature, I will NOT change unless I want to change—for whatever reason. And because of that, the universe will place me under pressure—even almost to the point of unaliving me to force the change that needs to happen. I have a deep and sacred will that refuses to bend unless I want it to. Which is good, but I'm also being asked to soften that stance. To hold that stance within my heart, but to soften to the energies that be and release to go with the flow of that deep Scorpio energy.
Which is what I want to do, and today was a huge step forward. But I plan to transform and re-create myself as many times as I need to get to where I want to go. As the song Rise by 10 Years says "out of the darkness, step into the light." And that's what I'm doing.
Sure my power still lies within my transformation, within my keeping circle tight and keeping my energy a privilege to access. But it also lies within the beauty that comes after that transformation. It lies within keeping my inner world and secrets under lock and mental boundaries between me and the demons I carry within my mind.
As a 12th houser, my mind will always be my largest battlefield. And perhaps one day more than a few people will be able to traverse the darkness that covers it—but until the day comes, I will continue to transform into my best self. I will continue to keep the subconscious under lock and key so I can heal. Not in the sense that I won't connect to that part of me, but in the sense that I will be discerning as to what I allow into my life to influence it rather than letting all of it run amuck.
And I encourage you to do the same thing. Having a 12th house placement is hard, but if you go with the transformations rather than fight them, you might find that you have a purpose so far outside of yourself that you never knew of.
As for me, I will step into my midheaven's purpose of healing people. And now I can say I am genuinely looking forward to it. I will burn myself to the ground as many times as it takes to get there.
